Fifty Reasons Why

Why? Because it was impossible. It was God’s idea for me to post 50 reasons why I admire my husband, one at a time, leading up to his 50th birthday.  As it is that God’s mind is without limit I knew I couldn’t fail if I allowed Him to be the Author.

So I set pen to paper and began to brainstorm.  Within minutes I had successfully come up with…uh, ten?  I prayed, sure.  But most important I observed my husband with intention, this time without seeking flawed character.  It required that I remove my flaw-finding spectacles and look through holy ones.  Through them I saw much that I admired.  The task became not only easier but enjoyable.  A treasure hunt, if you will.

Had he become admirable over the course of those three months?  No.  I’d just chosen to see what was there all along.

It seems that treasure is hidden in our relationships whether we choose to unearth it or not.

Fifty Reasons Why I Admire My Husband (Posted on FB beginning Sept 10 through November 28, 2013)

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #1:  He has consistently demonstrated the commandment, Honor your father and your mother.  He has committed to fly to Houston about every three or so months just to spend the weekend with them

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #2: He has persevered through extreme financial difficulty over the past two years and is still trusting God to provide for our needs. They are many…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #3: He has taught me so much about God’s grace by the grace he extends to others who have deserved his wrath by their dishonor. His reasoning? It might lead them (back) to Christ…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #4: He has lost over 20 pounds and is courageously changing old eating habits. Challenging for this former Registered and Licensed Dietitian who’s had to take a good look at what she eats, too.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #5: He stands firm on setting (very reasonable and gracious) boundaries for our children. He is tested in this area incessantly…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #6: He saved God’s sacred gift of sex for our wedding night. What would today be considered a gross lack of experience hasn’t proven to be the case..AT ALL . It’s made him more of a man in my eyes.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #7: He is man enough to humble himself and apologize.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #8: He is a very generous man. Like my father, he gives out of an abundant heart, not out of an abundant wallet.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #9: He is able to fix major appliances by simply coming in from the garage and saying, “It was the breaker switch. It got tripped somehow.” And, just like that, my “broken” dryer is in working order again. Major relief. Much money saved.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #10: He invites me to celebrate his business successes and even when things don’t appear to be in his favor. The alternative might be to find a happy hour somewhere else.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #11: There are very few computer technology headaches I’ve endured that he has not been able to rid me of. Sometimes, he doesn’t even have to perform his computer magic after I’ve yelled out in frustration; the problem just rights itself moments after he walks into the room.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #12: He is committed to the sport of eye bouncing. When an inappropriate image makes its way in front of his eyes he honors God, me and our marriage by bouncing his eyes away from it. It’s an exhausting sport, for certain. Atta boy!

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #13: He has chosen to live with me in an understanding/considerate way. Scripture teaches this (I Peter 3:7). It does not state that men are to understand their women especially given the fact that we do not often understand ourselves anyway

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #14: He directs me back again and again to the sovereignty of God in all circumstances saying “If God predetermined that it will happen than it can’t NOT happen…”. I first learned of this truth from him. It allows my heart to rest.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #15: Marriage and parenting is hard work For over 23 years he has chosen to stay and fight for us and our kids. And it isn’t because it’s easy or always a joy but because it’s right.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #16: OK, so it’s a small thing but, really, it’s not…He still opens the door for me. Look around ladies. Who still does this anymore?

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #17: He has generously supported my desire to pursue a writing career despite it costing me long hours in front of the MacAir laptop he purchased for me rather than by his side…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #18: You know, he’s never been one to pray aloud just to pray because everyone else is praying. He wisely recognizes it as a significant act and one he exercises as led by God

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #19: He has given many hours to volunteer his time and his organizational skills for community events over recent years (Charity Chase, Soup Kitchen, Carolina Cycle Challenge, Ballet guild…).

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #20: He keeps our family tanks filled with… sound advise, hugs, encouragement, one-on-one meals out with kids to stay updated, and, of course, plenty of gas. (“Dad/Honey, I need…”)

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #21: I had the privilege of listening to my husband as he stepped in to protect his youngest child with a lesson on proper boundaries with use of technology. That’s yet another reason why I admire this man.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #22: I hate a messy kitchen. It’s the heart of the home. He knows this and is not above doing the dishes – not because HE cares to the degree that I do but because he knows it blesses ME.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #23: There are some women who rarely, if ever, take needed time away from the demands of their homes because their men can’t/won’t step up to take care of things in their absence. I am grateful that I have never been one of those women.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #24: “Love…keeps no record of wrongs…” (I Corinth 13:5). He really doesn’t! And if he DOES have a record of my wrongs hidden away somewhere he never seems to be able to find it.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #25: In all matters of politics, reformed theology, current events, computer technology headaches I can say with confidence, “Go ask your dad.”

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #26: Hen-pecked? No way! He doesn’t stand for that. I know because I keep pecking…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #27: He desires his meals piping hot and served promptly at 6 each night, his house perfectly clean and cozy, everything put in its proper place, a beautifully landscaped front lawn, obedient and God-honoring children…etc…but demands NONE of it from any of us.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #28: It used to bother me that he refused to place a Christian fish emblem on the back of his car. I thought, “What, is he ashamed of his faith?” Quite the contrary. He knows that his (ahem, sometimes reckless) driving would be a hindrance to his testimony.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #29: A preacher in Houston once said, “Men, your job is to hold the bucket for your wife while she pours her emotions into it.” The bucket is full, but his arms are strong.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #30: Without hesitation I can say, “Honey, I simply don’t get it. Would you just read this convoluted passage of scripture and tell me what it means.” In fact, just this morning…

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #31: I tried to get on a friend’s website to read her recent post that addressed the issue of a teen brain and p_ _ n _ g _ _ p_y but found that because of the “p” word I was blocked from viewing it. “What the heck?!” I cried out in frustration to which my husband explained, “Oh, that. Yea, I recently blocked all of our computers and iPods and iPads from viewing anything that has that word in it.” Happy sigh.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #32: In a culture of emotionally controlled men his sensitivity is refreshing. And often surprising. I never know what might move him to…you got it, ladies…shed a tear. Ironically, too, a sure sign of great strength.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #33: One of the most secure things he has ever said was, “…I don’t have anywhere else to go.” The truth is he DOES have plenty of other places to find fulfillment, both real and imagined, but chooses not to see them as an option. This comment assures me there’s no marital escape hatch.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #34: He is quick to come to the defense of people, circumstances, situations that I might see through negative eyes and points out what IS good in them/there.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #35: With respect to parenting he has known when to be their coach (those days are over), when to be their cheerleader (adolescence…like NOW), and when to become their consultant (our oldest).

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #36: Ever increasing government encroachment into our lives sends him into orbit. And for upright reasons.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #37: No matter how much my flesh craves it he won’t say, “That’s great (beautiful, fabulous, genius), honey!” if he doesn’t really feel or think it’s true.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #38: The Lord has given me eyes to see the depth and display of his faith in Jesus Christ. It always, always surprises me.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #39: He really dislikes what he considers substandard. For instance, in considering what my upcoming writer’s website needs to look like I’m satisfied with a simple snapshot taken by my 12 year old out in the front yard. He reminds me that if I’m going to create a place where agents are going to view my work then it should look professional. I find that it is often in my best interest to put my weapons…er, I mean defenses…down and listen to his wise council.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #40: While I can recall nearly every line from I Love Lucy, Leave It To Beaver, and The Brady Bunch I am finding after nearly 24 years together than there are very few noteworthy literary works (J.R.R Tolkien, C.S. Lewis, George Orwell, to name a few) that he has not already read and could narrate in amazing detail. Many times I have benefitted from his strong comprehension skills.

Why I Admire My Husband. Reason #41: His many years of business travel aside, he has always made sure I receive a kiss from him before he leaves each day and/or before the day reaches its end. It safeguards our marriage.

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #42: He is wild at heart. While I might be content to say I saw the Golden Gate Bridge up close he suggested we ride our bikes across the thing (2006). When invited to bungee jump over the Guadalupe River in Texas he didn’t hesitate.

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #43: He values the relationships that we have established with others over the span of many years. He won’t cut off communication simply because an unforeseen shift occurs such as moving to another hometown, changing churches, kids no longer in the same school setting, etc. I am humbled by this…

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #44: The ever-so-challenging differences in communication between men and women…He is able to laugh at them rather than pound his fist on the counter in frustration. After all, there’s no sense in BOTH of us pounding our fists on the kitchen counter.

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #45: Borrowing a phrase from what I believe to be one of the sweetest, most engaging, heart-felt movies ever (Rocky), Rocky says of his relationship with Adrian, “We fill gaps.” True. Many of my husband’s strengths compliment my weaknesses. God surely knew.

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #46: Considering what I admire about my husband takes careful study of his behavior. It will be difficult to do this since he is on a plane with our oldest daughter right now. They are headed to Fort Collins, CO where he will accompany her on campus tour of Colorado State University. Hmmm. Now THAT is admirable!

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #47: He believes in me. During the 23 years we have been married he has always supported me in my endeavors. “Two are better than one because they have good return for their work.” Ecclesiastes 4:9

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #48: He has faithfully provided for our family. Even during times (like, uh, NOW) when we are hard-pressed financially he just keeps finding ways to cut spending, and provide. Ultimately, he trusts in God’s limitless provision. It seems I have taken the peace of mind I have always enjoyed for granted.

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #49: He is PRESENT. No one here suffers anxiety over whether or not he is available to them. Perusing pages – and there are many – of our family albums they are replete with photos of him at athletic games, horse shows, vacations, ballet and drum recitals, romantic get-aways, vacations (did I say that already?), camping, swim meets, holidays, romantic get-away’s (said that, too, right?), birthday gatherings… Families desperately need the presence of a father. Here in our home we are thankful!

Why I Admire My Husband Reason #50: On the twilight of this Thanksgiving day I have come to the end of my “50 Reasons Why” postings. But it isn’t the end. What was meant to honor HIM with has actually served to change MY heart. People are the way they are largely because of the way we view them. I’ve become less critical. When given a choice he prefers to avoid any unnecessary attention drawn to him. With an uncomfortable squirm he kindly suggested I stop…way back at reason 16. And again at, oh, 37 or so. I protested. Respectfully. And he allowed me to publicly post these 50 reasons. A very happy, happy 50th birthday to my most admirable man.

So how about you?  Whose lenses are you wearing and, through them, what do you see?  Who in your life needs to know how much you admire them?

2 Comments

  1. sbronstad says:

    Mary, this is truly delightful– Bruce is blessed to receive this from you, and I am blessed too in reading your heart

  2. Anne Payne says:

    I remember reading these on your FB page and thinking what a grand idea and special gift to share. Truly lovely, Mary.

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